Funniest toasts ever

Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. I drank to your health in company.

Cool friendly clever beautiful but enough about me.

Funniest toasts ever. More best man toasts and cheers. Funny quotes for wedding toasts. 46 Love is blind marriage is the eye-opener.

47 By all means marry. If you get a good wife youll be happy. If you get a bad one youll become a philosopher.

48 Marry a man your own age. As your beauty fades so will his eyesight. Famous drinking toasts quotes.

62 Lets have a toast to the incompetence of our enemies. 63 Alcohol may be mans worst enemy but the Bible says love your enemy. 64 Drink today and drown all sorrow.

You shall perhaps not do it tomorrow. Best while you have it use your breath. There is no drinking after death.

Before you weve collected dozens of toasts for a variety of purposes. Have a read-through bookmark this page and come back when you need a solid toast. Heres looking at you although heaven knows it takes all of my efforts.

May the skin of your bum never cover a drum. This humorous toast is written for friends with a shared history. The words are perfect for high school or college reunion toasts to reignite old bonds and memories.

To those who have seen us at our best and seen us at our worst and cant tell the difference. Funny drinking toasts are the perfect way to liven up any evening out with friends. Entertain your group with these witty heartfelt and goofy toasts.

If you like to be the jokester or fancy yourself the witty one in the group then you have to check out these funny drinking toasts. You cant go wrong with some of these for your next night out. May the stay there be as enjoyable as the way there __________.

I drank to your health in company. I drank to your health alone. I drank to your health so many timesI nearly ruined my own.

5 Amusing And Funny Scottish Drinking Toasts. 5 Awesome College Drinking Toasts. 3 Best Funny Thanksgiving Toasts Quotes You Need To Know.

1 Heres one of those classic toasts from George Bernard Shaw. 2 Heres a comedian quote that can be used as a funny toast. 3 Heres an insightful and profound yet witty quote toast.

40 of the Best Drinking Toasts. If the ocean was beer and I was a duck I would swim to the bottom and drink myself up. But the oceans not beer and Im not a duck so lets drink these pints and get messed up.

To the three rings of marriage. 30 Great Drink Toasts. Life is a waste of time.

Time is a waste of life. So why not get wasted all the time and have the time of our life. Heres to women beer and song may none of them be flat.

Heres to lying cheating stealing and drinkingIf youre going to lie lie for a friend. Funny wedding toast quotes accompanied by some happiness quotes will undoubtedly fortify your position as the best man or maid of honor. Marriage is the most natural state of man and the state in which you will find solid happiness.

If youve been asked to give a wedding toast chances are youre taking your role seriously. Often the best wedding toasts start with a joke even if they wind up with a sincere wish for the couples future happiness. When my older brother JACK asked me to give a toast at his wedding it occurred to me that this was not only a great honor but also an amazing opportunity to get even.

Like all brothers we did fight from time to time. FROM SEVEN TO NOON. Of course no one believed that Jack would ever beat me up.

Have you ever been on the spot and asked to make a toast. It can be a very uncomfortable experience if you arent prepared. The secret is to keep it short and be prepared.

Here are some funny Irish toasts that are easy to memorize. Many of these Irish drinking toasts will work both on St. Patricks Day or on a formal occasion like an Irish.

Funny birthday toasts should make your audience and the birthday boy or girl laugh with you not at you. Your funny birthday toasts should make the whole experience of getting older a little bit easier. If the birthday boy or girl cant take a joke leave this section immediately.

Try my Happy Birthday Toasts. When you make your funny birthday toasts deliver what all the best toasts. This couple was married for 67 years.

The husbandwife was asked if in all those years had they ever thought of divorce. Heavens no heshe replied. But never divorce Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.

Marriage is when a man and woman become as one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one. Funny Birthday Toasts.

Good friends are hard to come by. You are worth more than you can ever imagine to me. Dont worry about getting older.

Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you dont mind it doesnt matter. Cool friendly clever beautiful but enough about me.

Heres a toast to you. Screw like its being filmed. And drink like a true Irishman.

To the rapturous wild and ineffable pleasure. Of drinking at somebody elses expense. Drink for you know not when you came nor why.

Drink for you know not why you go nor whence. Heres to the husband and heres to the wife. May the two of you stay lovers for life.

Let us toast to the health of the bride let us toast to the health of the groom lets have a toast to the person who tied and lets raise a glass to everyone in this room.